As I mentioned I got my laxatives yesterday. I took two before I went to sleep because they are the herbal ones that work in your digestive system not in your stomach, so they take at least 6h to work. I totally forgot that I am going to help my mum set up for her lecture. It is problematic because I am runnning back and forth to the bathroom. 2 pills worked. Even tough I took the laxies my weight was monstrous 56. What the hell? Water weight or is 700 kcal too much? Since I am going to be at the lecture for like 5h with no access to food just coffee.

Edit: came back from the lecture thing. I had 4 hours to do my math wihtout interuption and I got a massive amount of work done. I also ended up having a rather big lunch. (300 kcal) but I needed to put something in my stomach because the waves of nausaiting cramps from laxies were unberable. But I had 300 kcals, most of it vegetables. I think I drank my weight in coffee.
After the lecture we went tu buy a new laptop for my mother since I am using her old one. I looked at my legs in my jeggings and I felt ok with them. I can't wait to finnaly see a larger gap.

I am seeing my only friend tomorow. I don't know many people here because I lost contact with all of the people from highschool (Its not like I wanted any contact with them) and people at my uni are morrons. The one exception is the friend I am meeting. She is TINY. Like bmi 18. TINY. She is also very organized and I like talking with her.

No laxies for me tonight because I dont want to be running from a bathrom to a bathroom at the mall tomorrow.

I know that it might be very hard for me to loose those remaining 3.5 kgs.. mainly because my body was NEVER at that size.. and its not even close to my normal weight... but I need to do it. And if it takes eating under 500 kcal, than so be it :)

I am sitting in my room drinkin vanilla flavoured tea. I don't like sugar in my tea. I am trying not to think about the giant tiramisu that my parents just brought back from the pastry shop. I am not gonna even get near it. NO. I want to see 55.0 on monday morning and there is only one way to do that.


I think I might start the SGD sooner. I just don't see how 700 kcal will get me to my goal quick enough. It seems like my body knows my tricks by now... I am just terrified that I will need to eat 500 kcal to maintain my goal weight when I get to it :/
Well.. I will find a way :) I will worry about it when I get there.